Only few weeks ago, there were a flower which in full bloom under the strong summer sun, a lot of cicadas here and there and I often saw mantises, but now they were all gone. Those pictures which I took them beginning of this month seems like memories of this summer. And about last photo, my daughter tried to put tape to bind the score. She handed over to me with her full smile. I was happy to see it and said "thank you" to her, but unfortunately, it's impossible to read...It's so amazing how she watch closely what the adults do, and now her hands are so skilful to make a lot of things. Anyway, she surprised me with many varieties of things every day.
Before she was born, I was thinking and having ambiguous image of so called "good mom" who always smiles and never scolded to the child. But I lately realized "I" who is not perfect and live with thousands of emotions every day was remaining, of course, and that person become "mom" after the child's birth. It's not like a "dramatic transformation". I'm still I, myself and have to face the reality of the raising child. Few weeks ago I was talking to my close cousin about my worries that I'm too strict to my daughter and scold her too often. She told me that she will not hesitate to tell me if she thinks there's something wrong is going on. I was so relieved to hear that. I don't want to say it's unavoidable to be harsh against the children, absolutely NO. Anger is often very harmful and make no use to change the situation. I'm trying to seek the way seriously how I can be always calm when I'm facing her. It's long long way to go.